| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] | Since my sister is getting married in about a month I’ve been thinking a lot about life, love, family, people, relationships, that kind of thing (because well it’s kind of inescapable). And the below are not really epiphanies I’ve had but more like important realizations I now strongly believe in. 1. People constantly change because their lives change. They grow and mature and learn and they have to change with that. Nothing is constant*, especially people. 2. Along with all that I’ve taken a deep look at all the people who have hurt me and whether I can forgive them/have forgiven them. Most I forgave some time ago (whether they asked for it or not). And another I thought I could never forgive. But then I thought about it long and hard. And I realized that I really have forgiven him. But the thing I realized is that what he did to me and my family showed me that he’s just not that great of a person and unless he can show me he’s changed (he so far has been unable to do that) I just don’t want him in my life because I don’t need people like that in my life. And you can forgive someone without welcoming them or wanting them back into your life. But in short; I think I truly have forgiven everyone who has hurt me. 3. And when you combine 1 and 2 (changing and forgiveness) and I know I’ve discussed this before but it’s come to light again in a big way with my sister’s wedding approaching…I believe all relationships are salvageable. I know Becky may disagree with me on this one since she has said it is a mistake to date a person twice (and it might be I’ve never done it before) and I’m talking all relationships here (the one that has been on my mind and is on my mind as I write this is between my uncle and I and I thought it was unsalvageable). No matter how hurt each person was, or how different they were, if true change and forgiveness has taken place then I think the relationship can be mended (and in some cases become better or stronger than the original relationship ever was). And I’m not saying to forget the past. The past is important. I’m saying there is no point in remembering the bad stuff and the regret because you can’t change that. So there is no point in hanging on to it (and I know that’s hard). If you can’t learn from it then toss it out. Hang on to the good stuff, that’s important too. Never forget that stuff. But if you can see that the person has truly changed and you forgive each other, and the relationship was good enough in the past that you think a second shot is worth it, then take it! Why not! Life is too short to think about the shoulda, coulda, wouldas. The worst anyone can ever say is no and then it’s over and you know (and knowing is almost always better than not knowing…at least in my opinion). Okay I could probably keep rambling (like I said I’ve been thinking a lot about this kind of stuff...I guess it happens when it’s getting to be around the holidays, and 2 siblings are getting married soon. I can’t help but get kind of sentimental and such.) Take care, Later days~”the world is just awesome” *I know there are some things that are constant, mainly scientific stuff…but you get what I was trying to say. P.S. You are all wonderful, caring, beautiful human beings and thanks for reading my postings (which I know can sometimes be self-indulgent, long and boring). You’re all amazing! (Yup I know that was lame but like I said I can’t help myself…with the feeling sentimental and all…I’m sure I’ll snap out of it).
|